Telling a story 2 –other student’s sequences

I’ve found these exercises via contacts on the OCA forum. It seems that a couple of students are not longer active but I have commented on their stories anyway.
http://stuartmcquade.com/dfp/Exercises/Entries/2011/6/18_Exercise_1__Frames_in_the_film.html
Stuart  - The Nursery Rhyme “Three Blind Mice” Stuart chose well for his story, just the right number of ideas expressed in rhyme to match the frames.
Frame 1: Three blind mice, shown with dark glasses. A very good way to show blindness. I have seen this done with shades and white sticks before.
Frame 2: See how they run – just that and appropriately shown in a farmyard setting. They look as if they are legging it at a fair pace too.
Frame 3: Running after the farmers wife who is carrying pails of milk. This identifies her as the protagonist.
Frame 4: The bloody deed! Suitably low key (there may be children watching!)
Frame 5: This frame sums up the story. They started off blind and now they are blind and tail less. No wonder there are tears being shed.
All the information is included here and it illustrates the story well. There is nothing superfluous as far as I can see.
http://digitalfilmproduction.blogspot.com/2009/08/project-1frames-in-film.html
Paul – Fable  “The Boy Who Cried Wolf”
Frame 1: Establishes the shepherd boy and his flock.
Frame 2: Boy cries “wolf” when there is no wolf in sight.
Frame 3: Unnecessary measures are taken to protect the flock from no threat .
Frame 4: The boy cries “wolf” again when a real wolf appears, there is no help available.
Frame 5: The wolf has eaten all of the sheep and the boy is disconsolate.
This was a difficult story to tell in five frames. My understanding of the fable was that the boy who cried wolf once too often suffered the consequences. I feel that somehow, there should be at least two false alarms. Perhaps the first frame could have included this as well as establishing the boy and the flock.
http://www.samaling.com/?p=18
Samantha – Fairy Story – “Cinderella”
Frame 1: Cinderella is shown scrubbing floors with the two ugly sisters looking on.
Frame 2: The Fairy Godmother and the mice help Cinders. The pumpkin is included in the frame.
Frame 3: Cinderella at the ball with Prince Charming. The clock is showing  nearly midnight.
Frame 4: Cinderella runs off and loses her slipper.
Frame 5: Cinderella shown with Prince Charming  - the glass slipper fits. The ugly sisters look on.
All of the information needed to understand the story is present (it has just occurred to me that because these stories are universal, there could be a tendency to unconsciously fill in the gaps) but having checked back, all of the characters are there (except the wicked stepmother who manifests herself in the ugly sisters), Cinders, the sisters, a prince and a godmother. The props are all there, the pumpkin and mice, the glass slipper and the clock.  I think Samantha has included everything necessary in her five frames.
Margaret – Nursery Rhyme – “Rock a bye Baby”
Frame 1: Shows the tree top, the cradle and the baby. Rock-a-bye Baby in the treetop
Frame 2: The wind is blowing (effective representation of the wind) and the cradle is rocking. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock
Frame 3: The bough is shown in close up, breaking. When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
Frame 4: The bough is breaking again – a longer shot.
Frame 5: The baby and the cradle falling. Down will come baby, cradle and all.
Unlike Three Blind Mice, this rhyme only has four ideas to illustrate. Margaret could have used the fourth frame to show the baby and cradle falling and the fifth to illustrate the predictable reaction of the baby or perhaps a concerned parent. There will be a political and sinister theme behind this rhyme (there usually is but I haven’t researched it yet) So perhaps the fifth frame could make some reference to that.
I’ll await comments on my frames and start work on my own story.

Project 1 Frames in the film

Exercise 1 Telling a story
I chose this story to illustrate in five frames. It should be fairly obvious what it is but I guess from the learning notes that I should allow the viewers judge for themselves.


To my fellow students and any other viewers, please comment, (not on the drawing please, I know it’s rubbish)

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This comment from Stuart (pasted from his email)
I immediately recognised the story to be Jack and the Beanstalk. However, I must admit I couldn't remember how it ended, so I had to do a bit of research.
After reading the whole story, it seems this was quite a task for Richard to try and squeeze into just five shots. For example, the harp and money being stolen aren't present. However, I think he’s managed to capture all of the important details – admittedly, I think it’s hard to fit even the shortest of nursery rhymes into just five shots.
Shot 1 shows the cow has been sold and Jack received beans in return.
Shot 2 shows the beans being thrown out of the window by (presumably) jack's mother.
Shot 3 shows Jack climbing the beanstalk in his back garden.
Shot 4 shows the house belonging to the giant couple with their gold-laying goose on the table. It was this shot that threw me as I couldn't remember the story that well. To make a distinction between Jack's house and the giants' house, I think I would have used a slightly wider shot for frame 3 and shown a very small house close to the top of the beanstalk - I think that would have also helped show Jack's intended destination and help define the location of shot 4 a little better.
Shot 5 is very clear as we can now see the tree stump after it's been cut, so it's obvious he's now back on the ground - and seeing Jack's house in the background reinforces this. And Jack’s motion of running with the goose (also connecting shots 4 and 5) help to show that he’s stolen it (or at least done something he shouldn’t have).
Thanks for your comments Stuart, very welcome.
I think my memories of the tale are coloured by various pantomimes I’ve seen over the years. They can be fairly liberal with the story line, depending on the number of actors/size of budget etc. I’d forgotten about the Harp and the money. The most important thing is that we got to think about the frames and how to construct a narrative using just the most important elements.

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This comment from Emily (pasted from the OCA Forum)
I had a look at your Jack and the Beanstalk story and really liked it especially the first 3 frames. I wondered at the 4th frame whether you could make it clearer that it's right up the top of the beanstalk,.. so maybe looking down? And also some way of showing that it's a giant. I can see you've made Jack small, but his smallness could be mistaken for being in the distance.
The last frame is really clear as well, though is it possible to show that it's the beanstalk that has come down. - perhaps some bean leaves (whatever they look like!)
I love the picture of Jack running away with the goose.
Thanks for your comments on my post. Most of the things you suggested I thought about but my drawing skills are limited. I could have spent a lot of time on it but I'm not sure if it would have improved it that much. I'll paste your comments in. I'm struggling with the second part of the exercise - I think a proverb may provide the basis for a story................

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